Read Online The Girl in the Window by Valerie Douglas - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Valerie Douglas
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hand, his strong fingers threaded through hers.
Closing her eyes, she remembered him, remembered the beautiful man he had been. That was something he’d never been able to believe, just how beautiful he was to her from the first moment she saw him. Maybe others hadn’t seen it – some said he was plain – but she had. He‘d been so beautiful to her with his thick dark hair, his soft brown eyes, his broad friendly face, and his smile.
That smile had lit up her life, lifted her spirits when they were down. He’d had the most beautiful smile, so bright, so real. She had loved his smile.
He’d been there for her as she struggled to balance school and work, their rare time together in the face of both their schedules precious.
She’d loved him so much.
The pain in her chest was like this enormous weight. It burned like fire, like acid, curling around her heart.
Matt.
They’d met in college. She‘d been taking a culinary management class and he’d been attending with an eye toward running a kitchen at a hotel or country club, juggling classes in hotel management and accounting.
Cooking was the one thing she’d known, that she’d been sure of, thanks to Ruth. It was something she’d been good at and Ruth had fostered that talent.
The times she’d spent with her foster mother in her kitchen had been some of the best of her life. Seeing the anticipation on the faces of the other kids, Ruth’s own and those of the other foster kids, had opened something up inside her.
It was something she could do.
Ruth had been so happy when Beth had met Matt, had found someone who could love her.
She smiled shakily at that memory, leaning back against the wall of her old bedroom as she remembered.
At first she couldn’t understand it, couldn’t understand this man who was being so nice to her, and then it had frightened her. She liked it, but she didn’t understand it.
So, she’d run to Ruth and found her, not surprisingly, in the kitchen.
Beth remembered it so vividly.
The counters had been filled with the preparations for dinner, vegetables waiting to be chopped, Ruth dredging veal in flour. The kitchen had smelled like the fresh herbs Ruth had added to the flour.
One look at her was all it had taken, but Ruth had said nothing, just nodded at the knife.
Without a word Beth had set to dicing the vegetables, the familiar action, the familiar smells calming, almost as soothing as Ruth’s presence.
“What’s wrong?” Ruth had said, as she dropped the floured veal into the hot pan, and the scent of sizzling cooked meat had surrounded them.
Beth’s mouth had watered.
For a minute, Beth had just chopped the onions and garlic for the sauce.
“There’s this…boy…man,” she’d said, and glanced at Ruth.
Ruth had laid a hand over hers and smiled. “Tell me about him.”
A widow, Ruth still told stories of the husband who had died so suddenly. Even he hadn’t known he’d had cancer. It just took him one day.
Ruth had filled the void with not only her own children, but those like Beth.
To her surprise, Beth had found herself smiling at just the thought of Matt.
“He’s…nice. Kind,” she’d said softly, and suddenly she’d been also terrified.
Even her own family hadn’t been nice to her. They hadn’t liked her. They’d sent her away.
“I don’t know what to do,” she’d blurted. “I’m so afraid.”
She’d had dates, but she’d always been uncertain, unsure. It had felt like she was walking a tightrope. With Matt, it didn’t, and somehow that felt even more frightening. There had been something reassuring about that tightrope, about knowing she could fall. If she made a mistake, it was just how she was.
With Matt, she couldn’t make mistakes. She didn’t want to lose him or his friendship.
“Oh, baby,” Ruth had said, pulling her into a quick hug before cupping Beth’s face in her hands. “Just be, Beth. Just be, and it’ll be fine, baby. It’ll be fine. Take it one day
Closing her eyes, she remembered him, remembered the beautiful man he had been. That was something he’d never been able to believe, just how beautiful he was to her from the first moment she saw him. Maybe others hadn’t seen it – some said he was plain – but she had. He‘d been so beautiful to her with his thick dark hair, his soft brown eyes, his broad friendly face, and his smile.
That smile had lit up her life, lifted her spirits when they were down. He’d had the most beautiful smile, so bright, so real. She had loved his smile.
He’d been there for her as she struggled to balance school and work, their rare time together in the face of both their schedules precious.
She’d loved him so much.
The pain in her chest was like this enormous weight. It burned like fire, like acid, curling around her heart.
Matt.
They’d met in college. She‘d been taking a culinary management class and he’d been attending with an eye toward running a kitchen at a hotel or country club, juggling classes in hotel management and accounting.
Cooking was the one thing she’d known, that she’d been sure of, thanks to Ruth. It was something she’d been good at and Ruth had fostered that talent.
The times she’d spent with her foster mother in her kitchen had been some of the best of her life. Seeing the anticipation on the faces of the other kids, Ruth’s own and those of the other foster kids, had opened something up inside her.
It was something she could do.
Ruth had been so happy when Beth had met Matt, had found someone who could love her.
She smiled shakily at that memory, leaning back against the wall of her old bedroom as she remembered.
At first she couldn’t understand it, couldn’t understand this man who was being so nice to her, and then it had frightened her. She liked it, but she didn’t understand it.
So, she’d run to Ruth and found her, not surprisingly, in the kitchen.
Beth remembered it so vividly.
The counters had been filled with the preparations for dinner, vegetables waiting to be chopped, Ruth dredging veal in flour. The kitchen had smelled like the fresh herbs Ruth had added to the flour.
One look at her was all it had taken, but Ruth had said nothing, just nodded at the knife.
Without a word Beth had set to dicing the vegetables, the familiar action, the familiar smells calming, almost as soothing as Ruth’s presence.
“What’s wrong?” Ruth had said, as she dropped the floured veal into the hot pan, and the scent of sizzling cooked meat had surrounded them.
Beth’s mouth had watered.
For a minute, Beth had just chopped the onions and garlic for the sauce.
“There’s this…boy…man,” she’d said, and glanced at Ruth.
Ruth had laid a hand over hers and smiled. “Tell me about him.”
A widow, Ruth still told stories of the husband who had died so suddenly. Even he hadn’t known he’d had cancer. It just took him one day.
Ruth had filled the void with not only her own children, but those like Beth.
To her surprise, Beth had found herself smiling at just the thought of Matt.
“He’s…nice. Kind,” she’d said softly, and suddenly she’d been also terrified.
Even her own family hadn’t been nice to her. They hadn’t liked her. They’d sent her away.
“I don’t know what to do,” she’d blurted. “I’m so afraid.”
She’d had dates, but she’d always been uncertain, unsure. It had felt like she was walking a tightrope. With Matt, it didn’t, and somehow that felt even more frightening. There had been something reassuring about that tightrope, about knowing she could fall. If she made a mistake, it was just how she was.
With Matt, she couldn’t make mistakes. She didn’t want to lose him or his friendship.
“Oh, baby,” Ruth had said, pulling her into a quick hug before cupping Beth’s face in her hands. “Just be, Beth. Just be, and it’ll be fine, baby. It’ll be fine. Take it one day
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