children—all pushing and pulsing against one another in the sweltering heat. The next day, when Uri went to a local bank for the cash we needed for the experiments, the people behind him crowded over his shoulders as if they were trying to board a train. (Once again, he was a rich Westerner, parachuting into a foreign culture.) When he made the request to cash $60,000 worth of travelers’ checks, the cashier went to speak to his manager and, hours of negotiations and discussions later, Uri got a huge bag full of rupees and proceeded to count them out in front of everyone.
Fearing that the people pushing behind him would tear the bag right out of his hands, he turned and pushed his way through the crowd, then fled as fast as he could. (We now understood the exhilaration that the famous bank robbers Bonnie and Clyde must have felt after each heist.)
Minott drove us up impossible roads to our destination—a peaceful village in the midst of verdant hills and fecund fields. Though rich in natural amenities, the village was economically poor. We dropped our gear, including the bag holding all that money, in our unlocked, rented house. Then we set out to meet the villagers. Insteadof being greeted by suspicious, red-robed Masai warriors who stood squinting at us, we met warm, welcoming, smiling people.
We discovered that life is considerably better for Khasi women than it is for their Masai counterparts. The Khasi are one of the world’s few matrilineal societies; inheritance flows through mothers to the youngest daughter. When a woman marries, she doesn’t move into her husband’s home; rather, he moves into hers (and out of his mother’s). The mother’s house is therefore the center of the family, and the grandmother is the head of the household. Khasi women don’t do much of the farming, but as the holders of the economic power they wield a great deal of authority over men.
Over the following weeks, we conducted ball-throwing experiments identical to those we conducted in Tanzania.
On one side of the village school building, the Khasi men dutifully queued up, and the researchers wrote down their survey data, just as we had done in Tanzania. One young man named Kyrham, who chose not to compete, was dressed in a simple white shirt and jeans. He smiled gently as he took hold of the first tennis ball. He seemed a little tentative at first, and his first attempt missed the bucket by a couple of feet. On the next try, he threw a bit more strenuously, and the ball landed on the other side of the bucket. He was clearly disappointed, and bit his lip. On the third try, he managed to land the ball squarely inside the bucket.
On the other side of the building, a woman stepped up to the line. Her assertiveness impressed us. Shaihun didn’t hesitate to choose the competitive option. She pulled up her sleeves, graspeda tennis ball, and squinted, ready for battle, at the plastic toy bucket ten feet in front of her. Confidently extending her bangled arm, she tossed the ball toward the target. She missed, but that didn’t lower her spirit. As the second ball landed inside the bucket, she shouted with joy. In fact, she sank the ball five times and in so doing wonplenty of money for a few minutes’ worth of games. She was totally, wonderfully competent, sure of herself, and in command. It was time for her competitors to move over.
The percentage of men and women who chose competition, per society, tells the culture story. In competitive games, Khasi women chose to compete not only more often than US and Masai women, but even more often than Masai warriors .
We had landed in a world turned on its head, gender-wise. Our results, summarized on the previous page, showed that 54 percent of the Khasi women chose to compete, whereas only 39 percent of the Khasi men did. Khasi women were more likely to choose to compete than even the super-patriarchal Masai men. Generally speaking, the Khasi women behaved more like the Masai (or US)
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