The Skin of Our Teeth

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Authors: Thornton Wilder
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FORTUNE TELLER laughs drily and makes the gesture of brushing away a nonsensical question. SABINA coughs and says:
    Oh, Mr. Antrobus,—dare I speak to you for a moment?
    ANTROBUS:
    What?—Oh, certainly, certainly, Miss Fairweather.
    SABINA:
    Mr. Antrobus . . . I’ve been so unhappy. I’ve wanted . . . I’ve wanted to make sure that you don’t think that I’m the kind of girl who goes out for beauty contests.
    FORTUNE TELLER:
    That’s the way!
    ANTROBUS:
    Oh, I understand. I understand perfectly.
    FORTUNE TELLER:
    Give it a little more. Lean on it.
    SABINA:
    I knew you would. My mother said to me this morning: Lily, she said, that fine Mr. Antrobus gave you the prize because he saw at once that you weren’t the kind of girl who’d go in for a thing like that. But, honestly, Mr. Antrobus, in this world, honestly, a good girl doesn’t know where to turn.
    FORTUNE TELLER:
    Now you’ve gone too far.
    ANTROBUS:
    My dear Miss Fairweather!
    SABINA:
    You wouldn’t know how hard it is. With that lovely wife and daughter you have. Oh, I think Mrs. Antrobus is the finest woman I ever saw. I wish I were like her.
    ANTROBUS:
    There, there. There’s . . . uh . . . room for all kinds of people in the world, Miss Fairweather.
    SABINA:
    How wonderful of you to say that. How generous!—Mr. Antrobus, have you a moment free? . . . I’m afraid I may be a little conspicuous here . . . could you come down, for just a moment, to my beach cabana . . . ?
    ANTROBUS:
    Why-uh . . . yes, certainly . . . for a moment . . . just for a moment.
    SABINA:
    There’s a deck chair there. Because: you know you do look tired. Just this morning my mother said to me: Lily, she said, I hope Mr. Antrobus is getting a good rest. His fine strong face has deep deep lines in it. Now isn’t it true, Mr. Antrobus: you work too hard?
    FORTUNE TELLER:
    Bingo!
    She goes into her shop.
    SABINA:
    Now you will just stretch out. No, I shan’t say a word, not a word. I shall just sit there,—privileged. That’s what I am.
    ANTROBUS:
    Taking her hand.
    Miss Fairweather . . . you’ll . . . spoil me.
    SABINA:
    Just a moment. I have something I wish to say to the audience.—Ladies and gentlemen. I’m not going to play this particular scene tonight. It’s just a short scene and we’re going to skip it. But I’ll tell you what takes place and then we can continue the play from there on. Now in this scene—
    ANTROBUS:
    Between his teeth.
    But, Miss Somerset!
    SABINA:
    I’m sorry. I’m sorry. But I have to skip it. In this scene, I talk to Mr. Antrobus, and at the end of it he decides to leave his wife, get a divorce at Reno and marry me. That’s all.
    ANTROBUS:
    Fitz!—Fitz!
    SABINA:
    So that now I’ve told you we can jump to the end of it,—where you say:
    Enter in fury MR. FITZPATRICK , the stage manager.
    MR. FITZPATRICK:
    Miss Somerset, we insist on your playing this scene.
    SABINA:
    I’m sorry, Mr. Fitzpatrick, but I can’t and I won’t. I’ve told the audience all they need to know and now we can go on.
    Other ACTORS begin to appear on the stage, listening.
    MR. FITZPATRICK:
    And why can’t you play it?
    SABINA:
    Because there are some lines in that scene that would hurt some people’s feelings and I don’t think the theatre is a place where people’s feelings ought to be hurt.
    MR. FITZPATRICK:
    Miss Somerset, you can pack up your things and go home. I shall call the understudy and I shall report you to Equity.
    SABINA:
    I sent the understudy up to the corner for a cup of coffee and if Equity tries to penalize me I’ll drag the case right up to the Supreme Court. Now listen, everybody, there’s no need to get excited.
    MR. FITZPATRICK AND ANTROBUS:
    Why can’t you play it . . . what’s the matter with the scene?
    SABINA:
    Well, if you must know, I have a personal guest in the audience tonight. Her life

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