Read Online Lemon by Cordelia Strube - Free Book Online

really irritates me. ‘How does his being a guy free him of responsibility?’ I ask.
    â€˜That’s obvious.’
    â€˜How is that obvious?’
    â€˜He’s a guy,’ she says like I’m stupid.
    â€˜Hermione doesn’t hate Helena at the beginning,’ I say. ‘Helena hates Helena.’
    â€˜Why does Helena hate Helena?’ Huff asks. As usual he’s leaning on the back of his chair, looking as though he’s about to make some profound statement. He never does.
    â€˜Why does anybody hate themselves?’ I ask.
    â€˜Interesting question,’ Huff says. ‘Why does anybody hate themselves?’
    Megan, this fat girl, says, ‘Because their parents don’t love them.’
    Everybody tries to absorb this. Huff narrows his eyes to suggest that he’s in deep contemplation. Being parentless, I can’t comment.
    â€˜Do we know that Helena’s parents didn’t love her?’ Huff inquires.
    â€˜She’s totally ugly,’ Kirsten explains. ‘She hates herself because she’s ugly. That’s obvious.’
    â€˜Who says she’s totally ugly?’ I ask.
    â€˜ She does,’ Nicole says.
    â€˜No, she doesn’t, she just says she isn’t short and cute like Hermione.’
    â€˜Beauty is in the eye of the beholder,’ Megan says, which is truly outrageous as she never says anything. Personally, I think if you don’t think you’re beautiful, nobody else will. I know this from experience as I happen to think I’m hideous even though this Greek plumber who shows up for Cookies ’n’ Cream tells me I’m ‘gorgee-ous.’ He says it repeatedly, licking and dripping, ‘You are a gorgee-ous girl. Howcome you not married, what’s a-matta with boyz deese days? They got no cocks?’ When I tell him I’m only sixteen, he does this Mediterranean shrug like there’s no better time to get hitched. The point is, him telling me I’m gorgee-ous doesn’t make me feel any less hideous.
    â€˜You’re suggesting that she suffers from low self-esteem,’ Huff says.
    Low self-esteem is a term used to excuse rudeness, laziness, meanness. Any time there’s a problem at school the likes of Blecher blame it on low self-esteem. I bet Blecher figures old Hitler suffered from poor self-esteem. The rude, lazy and mean types don’t get any less rude, lazy and mean after Blecher’s pep talks. The old sense of entitlement kicks in. They want it all, and everybody knows the fastest road to power and riches is guns. Guns are a big self-esteem booster.
    â€˜She’s got a crush on a guy and he hates her,’ Kirsten says. ‘That would depress anybody.’
    â€˜Why?’ I ask. ‘I mean, why would you want somebody who hates you? It seems to me, if you had half a brain, you’d go read a book or something.’ That’s another thing I can’t stand about Shakespeare. He’s always making people chase after people who hate them.
    â€˜It’s not about brains,’ Nicole says.
    â€˜That’s obvious,’ Kirsten says.
    What they mean is it’s about sex, something I – a frigid dyke – wouldn’t know about. Huff’s getting a little red around the ears with all this hormonal activity. The bell goes. I beat it.
    Rossi won’t come out of the bathroom because she’s discovered that Kirsten and company have been texting about her, describing demeaning sexual acts she allegedly performs to try to be popular. They say she’ll let a guy shove anything up her snatch, including small animals and snakes. I tried to make like this is so ludicrous it’s funny. I did a fake laugh - me who despises fakery - hoping to keep Rossi from taking the slander too seriously. Ha ha ha. That’s when she went into the bathroom. I can’t see her taking pills or anything so I’m not too fussed. Her mother yells at us from