some reason. A headache jumped out of nowhere. A few minutes ago we were making love on the bed now he was sitting on the toilet crying. ‘Can I come in?’ I winced away as he screamed at me saying no . And then he continued sobbing. I looked at my shirt to make sure all the buttons were closed. I was going to walk inside so that I could calm him. His phone buzzed – he answered it as if he was holding his finger on the button. I’m so sorry Angeline so sorry. He whispered. I scratched my forehead. Are you all right? He gasped for air. Is the child all right? Angeline? Why aren’t you speaking to me what’re you doing? I think this had to be one of the weirdest moments of my life. I reached for the door handle and then stopped. I could hear him lower his tone even more – to devilish whispers. I’m going cut our child you like don’t you Angeline . My mouth dropped open – did I just hear that right? He began giggling. My chest contracted. My lungs kicked out air. I heard a baby scream. The cell went off. I shook my head and opened the door. He looked at me as if he had been crying for five days straight. Eyes bloodshot. Lips raw. The sweat and gel an intoxicating mix that made his face glisten. ‘What the fuck is going on?’ I asked. ‘I have to go.’ Go where? Do we need to call the police? He couldn’t even push himself up from the toilet. I don’t understand what was going on. ‘James please tell me what is going on.’ ‘I can’t not now.’ He used the sink to pull himself up. ‘Need to get–’ He turned around and held the sink. He coughed. ‘Are you, ok?’ He coughed again. Liquid slurped. I walked in to help. But then I saw lines of sweat snake down his neck – like his head was an open tap. I gasped. My heart didn’t feel light anymore. ‘I don’t feel good.’ He gripped the sink with both hands. His coughing turned into spitting. His neck now a stream of sweat. I was too stunned – too dazed to compute what was happening in front of me. I made my way around him so that I could see his face but I didn’t get far. He waved his hand back. ‘Velvet go.’ ‘I’ll call the ambul–’ He waved again. ‘No just go.’ ‘Are you ok?’ Of course he wasn’t. I swallowed and leaned. I couldn’t see his face. He had it tucked in the sink – coughing. My knees felt weak. For some reason I just wanted to see his face. I stepped closer. And then he swiped his hand back – his nails cut me like a knife. A line of red slid down my forearm. I can’t believe it but I think I was going to cry. ‘James please tell me what’s wrong.’ His head collapsed into the sink. He began screaming down the pipe. His body convulsed. He gripped the sink harder but it didn’t keep his body stable. And then his knees cracked against the cupboard. I stepped closer but feared for another swipe. I had to do something – I grabbed his shoulder. A tear slid down the bridge of my nose. ‘James look at–’ He did look, and what I saw, I didn’t like. I let go of his shoulder and stepped backward. His lips were blown up like a purple balloon, his right cheek hung off his face like a slab of meat, lines of blood slid down his nose that occasionally spurted into bigger ones, but it were his eyes that made me slap my hand onto my mouth. They reminded me of marbles my brother used to play with; not the colorful ones, the black glossy kind. He reached his hand out to me. ‘H-help please.’ A scream slipped through my hand. My knees shook. I had to grab the wall for support. I looked away and closed my eyes. This didn’t feel real. I need to count, five-four-three-two– A thump startled my eyes open. He was halfway toward me, crawling, asking for help. The skin from his cheek fell off. My heart fell into my stomach; think I was going to faint. I skid along the wall and bumped into the corner. With his stomach flat on the floor, he cocked his chin up. ‘Angeline me help please it hurts.’