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Authors: Jon Trace
Tags: Fiction:Suspense
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and the monster who murdered her.
It’s not something he wants to dwell on.
He pilots his thoughts back to Tina. A few days ago he hadn’t even known she’d existed; now she’s assumed a central role in his life.
The first woman he’s slept with. He’s sure it would have been no big thing for her. But for Tom, it’s a landmark . He struggles to define exactly what kind.
One to be proud of? Or ashamed?
He really isn’t sure. Years of Catholicism do that to you. They make you uncertain about how you should feel about anything pleasurable, especially sex.
Like most priests, Tom tried hard not to think about being intimate with a woman. And like most of his colleagues, there were times when he failed.
In those moments, he’d imagined such a relationship would start off slow - a warm kind of friendship - and then gradually grow into something deeper and more passionate. He’d never dreamed that he would end up behaving like a hopeless teenager and losing his virginity in a drunken one-night stand.
But then again - if he was honest with himself - he hadn’t been that drunk. Tipsy - yes. Loose and uninhibited - certainly. But so drunk that he couldn’t have stopped himself? No, not at all.
And now? In the full glare of the morning light - what did he think now?
Need it be a one-night stand? Is that what she wants? What he wants?
He can’t answer any of the questions. It all seems so horrendously confusing. And to think he’d spent years counselling parishioners on their marital problems. The thought brings a smile to his face. How hopelessly unqualified he was.
But Tom has no regrets. None at all. Whatever happens next, he knows it is all part of the new person he is becoming. A person who, overnight, has allowed a complete stranger into his life. And in giving her the most precious thing he’d had left, he’s allowed her to become an intimate player in his new life.
But for how long?
The question haunts him as he meanders back towards the hotel.
CHAPTER 15
Cosseted in a cocoon of a quilt, Tina Ricci squints sleepily at the half-open bedroom door.
Tom finishes sneaking in. ‘Sorry. I was trying not to wake you.’
She struggles to speak. ‘Errrm - hi. I kinda thought you’d gone.’
He moves gingerly towards the bed. ‘I didn’t think I was supposed to.’
‘You’re not.’ Then in an instant she finds herself defensively adding: ‘Not unless you want to, that is.’
‘I don’t.’
‘Then come back here.’ She pats the cool side of the mattress. ‘Give me a chance to show you the real meaning of Morning Service.’
Tom lifts a crumpled brown bag. ‘I bought coffee and croissants. A small repayment for lunch yesterday.’
‘Great.’ She straightens the pillows and sits up a little. ‘But I warn you, I’m famished. We missed dinner - and burned off a lot of calories - so I’m gonna need more than you’ve got there.’
‘Understood.’ Tom takes out the coffees, rips open the bag of croissants and spreads the paper to catch crumbs. His face gives away that he’s going to awkwardly switch subjects and say something about last night. ‘Listen, I’m really new to all this, so please forgive me if I’m very awkward and say all the wrong things.’ He looks embarrassed. ‘Or more likely, don’t say the things that I should.’
She takes a coffee from him. ‘Tom, there are no rules. Just say what you want - anything you feel like saying.’
Right now, saying what he feels turns out to be harder than he ever imagined it would be. ‘Okay. Then help me out here. How do you feel?’
‘I think you’re sweet.’ She pauses, then adds, ‘And special . Not because you used to be a priest and we fucked.’ She looks horrified. ‘ Sorry ! I didn’t mean to say fucked, I mean—’ Now she looks embarrassed. ‘Listen, you’re special because you’re a good guy. An honest guy. A nice guy. And I think it must be quite something to get to know you - really know you.’
He
It’s not something he wants to dwell on.
He pilots his thoughts back to Tina. A few days ago he hadn’t even known she’d existed; now she’s assumed a central role in his life.
The first woman he’s slept with. He’s sure it would have been no big thing for her. But for Tom, it’s a landmark . He struggles to define exactly what kind.
One to be proud of? Or ashamed?
He really isn’t sure. Years of Catholicism do that to you. They make you uncertain about how you should feel about anything pleasurable, especially sex.
Like most priests, Tom tried hard not to think about being intimate with a woman. And like most of his colleagues, there were times when he failed.
In those moments, he’d imagined such a relationship would start off slow - a warm kind of friendship - and then gradually grow into something deeper and more passionate. He’d never dreamed that he would end up behaving like a hopeless teenager and losing his virginity in a drunken one-night stand.
But then again - if he was honest with himself - he hadn’t been that drunk. Tipsy - yes. Loose and uninhibited - certainly. But so drunk that he couldn’t have stopped himself? No, not at all.
And now? In the full glare of the morning light - what did he think now?
Need it be a one-night stand? Is that what she wants? What he wants?
He can’t answer any of the questions. It all seems so horrendously confusing. And to think he’d spent years counselling parishioners on their marital problems. The thought brings a smile to his face. How hopelessly unqualified he was.
But Tom has no regrets. None at all. Whatever happens next, he knows it is all part of the new person he is becoming. A person who, overnight, has allowed a complete stranger into his life. And in giving her the most precious thing he’d had left, he’s allowed her to become an intimate player in his new life.
But for how long?
The question haunts him as he meanders back towards the hotel.
CHAPTER 15
Cosseted in a cocoon of a quilt, Tina Ricci squints sleepily at the half-open bedroom door.
Tom finishes sneaking in. ‘Sorry. I was trying not to wake you.’
She struggles to speak. ‘Errrm - hi. I kinda thought you’d gone.’
He moves gingerly towards the bed. ‘I didn’t think I was supposed to.’
‘You’re not.’ Then in an instant she finds herself defensively adding: ‘Not unless you want to, that is.’
‘I don’t.’
‘Then come back here.’ She pats the cool side of the mattress. ‘Give me a chance to show you the real meaning of Morning Service.’
Tom lifts a crumpled brown bag. ‘I bought coffee and croissants. A small repayment for lunch yesterday.’
‘Great.’ She straightens the pillows and sits up a little. ‘But I warn you, I’m famished. We missed dinner - and burned off a lot of calories - so I’m gonna need more than you’ve got there.’
‘Understood.’ Tom takes out the coffees, rips open the bag of croissants and spreads the paper to catch crumbs. His face gives away that he’s going to awkwardly switch subjects and say something about last night. ‘Listen, I’m really new to all this, so please forgive me if I’m very awkward and say all the wrong things.’ He looks embarrassed. ‘Or more likely, don’t say the things that I should.’
She takes a coffee from him. ‘Tom, there are no rules. Just say what you want - anything you feel like saying.’
Right now, saying what he feels turns out to be harder than he ever imagined it would be. ‘Okay. Then help me out here. How do you feel?’
‘I think you’re sweet.’ She pauses, then adds, ‘And special . Not because you used to be a priest and we fucked.’ She looks horrified. ‘ Sorry ! I didn’t mean to say fucked, I mean—’ Now she looks embarrassed. ‘Listen, you’re special because you’re a good guy. An honest guy. A nice guy. And I think it must be quite something to get to know you - really know you.’
He
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