anyway). And Jared has complained about the Rust Bucketâs clutch a grand total of forty-three times. I counted.
There are bags piled up on the ground beside them. The Rust Bucketâs a few minutesâ walk back through trees and a couple of fields, parked in a lane where it wonât get in anybodyâs way. Basically: the arse-end of nowhere.
âBetter get used to roughing it, Lim,â Steffan had laughed as Jared turned off the ignition.
âYouâre not serious.â
âCourse I am. The great outdoors, isnât it? Sleeping under the starsâ¦â
âNaff off.â
âCooking food over a campfire. Washing in the riverâ¦â
âYouâre definitely not serious.â
âSays who?â Heâd blinked at me with such sincerity that he had me believing him.
The horror. It was only when his face crumpled and he burst out laughing, shaking his head and saying âYour face!â over and over again that I realized he was messing with me.
âI hate you both.â I tried not to pout. âWhen you said âcampingâ, I kind of pictured an actualâ¦campsite. Some of them have shower blocks. Some of them even have â shocker â pools .â
Steffan shook his head. âRound here. In this weather. Like thereâd be anywhere with space in the summer holidays.â
Jared snorted. âAnd like anywhere would let us in.â
Fair point.
He carries on. âSee that shed over there?â He pointed through the windscreen to a low, white-painted building squatting at the far side of the nearest field. âThatâs the St Judeâs changing rooms. And over there?â He pointed the other way. âA mile or so down the road, thereâs a pub. No cooking over a campfire. Promise.â
Everyone knows what happened at St Judeâs. At the start of the year, the young PE teacher got accused ofâ¦well, doing something he shouldnât have been doing with a Year Ten pupil in the changing rooms after a football match. Needless to say, he didnât stay a teacher at St Judeâs very long. I donât know what happened to the kid, but the teacher was gone pretty sharpish and no oneâs seen him since. Thatâs the thing about small towns and reputations. Theyâre like tinder, dry as anything â it only takes a single spark, and before you know it the whole forestâs burning. Anyone whoâs ever lived in a town like ours could tell you that.
The upshot of this particular conflagration, however, is that the St Judeâs changing room building no longer has a lock on its front doorâ¦
âYouâre a genius!â I said as I figured it out. No lock means that a hot shower is there for the taking.
âNot so hateful now, is it?â Steffan grinned. Heâs not quite right; itâs just that Iâll probably hate them less after a shower.
âYouâre holding it upside down.â
âBollocks I am.â
âMight as well be holding those, all the good itâs doing you,â Jared mutters out of the side of his mouth at Steffan, who makes a rude gesture with the rod heâs holding.
Iâm bored. And I tell them so.
âHow can you be bored?â Jared peers at me over the top of the instruction sheet. âHere, surrounded by the glory of natureâ¦â He waves his arms around as if to make a point.
From my tree stump, I peer past him at the clearing in the middle of a crappy little collection of trees that is our campsite for the night.
âThe glory of nature? Since when has the glory of nature included an empty wine bottle, three rusty lager cans andâ¦â I squint, just to make sure. âAn upside-down shopping trolley sitting in the river? And how the hell did that get all the way out here, anyway? Whoâd be so determined to dump a trolley in this particular spot that theyâd haul it through a load of
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