the back of Rukus’ truck. I weave prayers for Alma in my mind, but in my heart, I know they’ll do no good. She’ll wake up chained and stay that way until she dies. And it’s my fault.
“Move along,” one of the nannies croaks.
Sabrina leans in to inspect my face. “Ground control to Jan. You’re drifting out to space.”
“You’ve been watching too much Buck Rogers ,” I say, handing my tray over to the last hair-netted nanny. She plunks the bread onto the tray.
Sabrina follows close behind. “I know you were run through the ringer this morning, but you gotta let it go or they’ll sedate you. You don’t want to end up like Lulu.” Our eyes flick to the back table where Lulu sits alone, her head dipping into her carrots, her long, matted hair over her eyes. Her fingernails have been gnawed clean off and her shirt is on backward. Lulu was once a very angry girl. Now she’s addicted to pills.
Sabrina sighs. “The poor babies that pop out of that belly.”
We find a quiet table near the back. The rest of the D Hall girls are clustered a few tables up, but Sabrina and I don’t eat with them. They’re pretty bitter.
I pick at my food, thinking of Alma and Dr. Houghtson. Sabrina stabs carrots and tries to angle them into my mouth like I’m a baby, but I shove her fork away.
Sabrina grabs my bread and is about to airplane it in my mouth when we see them approaching, Breanne and Micha. I don’t see Charlene, but she can’t be far behind. My body stiffens. Sabrina goes rigid beside me.
“Heard you almost got put out ,” Breanne says, sliding her pregnant body into the bench across from us. Micha does the same, easing her giant belly down and puffing out an exhausted breath. When you’re that pregnant, even sitting down is tiring. It’s amazing that I want something like that, but I do.
Breanne leans forward. “I said, I heard you almost got put out .” She grabs the bread off Sabrina’s tray and starts chewing. “Why are you still here?”
I stare at her face, splattered in orange freckles like her orange hair, the color I imagine Opie’s is from the Andy Griffith Show . When I don’t speak, she slams a palm down on the table. “Are you traumatized? Can’t speak anymore?”
“Leave her alone,” Sabrina says, gripping her fork. “Let her eat.”
Breanne laughs with a mouthful of bread. Micha leans forward. “You taking her food, turtle? That why you’re so fat?”
Sabrina raises the fork in her fist, but I push it down. “You can have our bread,” I say, flicking mine off the tray toward Micha. “Just leave us alone.”
“How generous,” Micha says, taking the slice and tucking it into a pocket. “Is that how you convinced them to let you stay? By doing something generous ?”
My skin prickles as they laugh. I know what they’re implying, and it hits too close to home. I lower my eyes.
“You fat heifers,” Sabrina says, placing both palms on the table. “Micha, I hear the only generous one around here is Dr. Merriweather. He gave you that, didn’t he?” Sabrina nods toward Micha’s swollen belly.
I look up, stunned. Dr. Merriweather was fooling around with Micha, too? The bloom on Micha’s cheeks tells the truth. Her face morphs from shock to anger to ferocity. Sabrina shouldn’t—
Micha grabs a cup of steaming hot coffee and slings it at Sabrina’s face. Sabrina howls, pushing back, her hands tugging at her hot, wet clothing. Black droplets drip from the red bow on her head. Her trembling hands touch the solitary pink rose on her chest, now stained.
“You bitch!” she screams as she lunges across the table at Micha.
Arms and legs and shouts and curses. I reach for Sabrina, but can’t get a grip on her. She grabs Micha by the collar and pulls her across the tabletop. Micha is clawing, hands out, mouth open. Breanne steps back and gestures for the orderlies who are running toward us. A Taser comes out of an orderly’s pocket.
“Sabrina, stop!” I yank
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