something at first, so I badgered him until he had finally confessed his nefarious desires to me. I had never made love to a man in such a manner, and while I was a bit apprehensive of what it might feel like to be taken from behind (like some kind of animal, I might add) I decided that if Thomas didn’t get his desires met with me, I feared he would take another lover and leave me to myself. And that simply was not an option. Me and Thomas were meant to be, and nothing, not even his strange sexual requests, would stop me from loving him.
So I went down on all fours after we had found a fairly secluded spot and I waited in anticipation as Thomas lifted up my dress. I had taken to wearing as little beneath that dress as possible when meeting him in the dark. It was much easier than to waste time as he fumbled with the undergarments, his raging member impatient to get to the good stuff.
So, yes, that night Thomas did take me from behind. Not once, but two times. I will not go into all the sordid details, because I am not that kind of woman. Suffice it to say, that by his grunts and moans (and some of my own as well) I judged the night a success.
While usually he would give me a quick kiss goodbye, this night was different. He pushed me against the barn wall and kissed me passionately, as if my mouth contained the water that would quench his thirst. His hands found their way all over my body, as he explored every place that no married man should.
“I love you, Josie,” he grunted between passionate kisses. “You mean the world to me.”
And then he left me.
So why did I just tell you all of that, dear diary? It was to set up the scene, so you could feel the same shock and anger I felt as the events at the beginning of this entry took place.
We had found each other at my place, in my bed, which was a rare occurrence indeed. (I live with a couple of other girls, but they were all luckily out of town for a few days. They asked me to come along, but I politely declined. This made them suspicious, because I’m usually the first to jump at the chance to get out of our boring little town. They surmised that I wanted to stay because of a man. If only they knew how right they were.) So after we had finished our carnal activities, both from the front and behind, I had proposed to Thomas that we might run away together.
You would have thunk that I had suggested we murder his wife by the kind of response I got. He flew into a rage, putting his clothes back on as quickly as he could, and accusing me of being Devil’s spawn or some other such nonsense.
Naturally, after he had left, closing the door much more abruptly than was necessary, I laid in bed and put the covers over my naked flesh and sobbed like I’d never sobbed before. Something was definitely different about my lover, and I needed to find out what. I would follow him for the rest of my days if that’s what it took. I will hide in the shadows and watch his every move, and when there was something to hear, I will come closer and listen, undetected behind a door. A wall. Whatever the hell else. Thomas owed me an explanation and not to mention an apology. There was simply no reason for him to treat a lady like me in such a manner. No reason at all.
So that’s how I spent the rest of the night, sobbing and plotting, until one of them made me feel better about the other and I fell asleep like a babe would, and went into deep darkness for the rest of the night.
––––––––
W ow. Just wow. I put the journal back down and felt like I needed a long hot bath. This Josie girl was definitely a character, alright. The sheer immorality and nonchalant attitude she portrayed in her diary entries was almost sickening, but also very fascinating. The classic novels of my childhood were nothing like the sordid diary I was reading. Some of it verged on porn, though as I’d never seen or read any, I could not be sure.
I felt sick to my stomach so I left the journal on
So I went down on all fours after we had found a fairly secluded spot and I waited in anticipation as Thomas lifted up my dress. I had taken to wearing as little beneath that dress as possible when meeting him in the dark. It was much easier than to waste time as he fumbled with the undergarments, his raging member impatient to get to the good stuff.
So, yes, that night Thomas did take me from behind. Not once, but two times. I will not go into all the sordid details, because I am not that kind of woman. Suffice it to say, that by his grunts and moans (and some of my own as well) I judged the night a success.
While usually he would give me a quick kiss goodbye, this night was different. He pushed me against the barn wall and kissed me passionately, as if my mouth contained the water that would quench his thirst. His hands found their way all over my body, as he explored every place that no married man should.
“I love you, Josie,” he grunted between passionate kisses. “You mean the world to me.”
And then he left me.
So why did I just tell you all of that, dear diary? It was to set up the scene, so you could feel the same shock and anger I felt as the events at the beginning of this entry took place.
We had found each other at my place, in my bed, which was a rare occurrence indeed. (I live with a couple of other girls, but they were all luckily out of town for a few days. They asked me to come along, but I politely declined. This made them suspicious, because I’m usually the first to jump at the chance to get out of our boring little town. They surmised that I wanted to stay because of a man. If only they knew how right they were.) So after we had finished our carnal activities, both from the front and behind, I had proposed to Thomas that we might run away together.
You would have thunk that I had suggested we murder his wife by the kind of response I got. He flew into a rage, putting his clothes back on as quickly as he could, and accusing me of being Devil’s spawn or some other such nonsense.
Naturally, after he had left, closing the door much more abruptly than was necessary, I laid in bed and put the covers over my naked flesh and sobbed like I’d never sobbed before. Something was definitely different about my lover, and I needed to find out what. I would follow him for the rest of my days if that’s what it took. I will hide in the shadows and watch his every move, and when there was something to hear, I will come closer and listen, undetected behind a door. A wall. Whatever the hell else. Thomas owed me an explanation and not to mention an apology. There was simply no reason for him to treat a lady like me in such a manner. No reason at all.
So that’s how I spent the rest of the night, sobbing and plotting, until one of them made me feel better about the other and I fell asleep like a babe would, and went into deep darkness for the rest of the night.
––––––––
W ow. Just wow. I put the journal back down and felt like I needed a long hot bath. This Josie girl was definitely a character, alright. The sheer immorality and nonchalant attitude she portrayed in her diary entries was almost sickening, but also very fascinating. The classic novels of my childhood were nothing like the sordid diary I was reading. Some of it verged on porn, though as I’d never seen or read any, I could not be sure.
I felt sick to my stomach so I left the journal on
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