Read Online Layers Off by Lacey Silks - Free Book Online Page B

K. I’ve had my share of fooling around. There’s so much you can do with a woman’s body, and you know how much I love learning.” That rusty growl rolled off his tongue like a promise to show me exactly what he could do. Shivers coursed through me, centering deep in my core, and I found it difficult to swallow. Hearing him say things like that, and not feeling them directly on my skin or remembering from my own experiences, was so different – in a good way.
    “I’m sorry. I should know better than this. I shouldn’t be this forward with you.”
    “No, baby steps are all right. Talking is good; remembering not so much. It’s like I’m getting ready for you to be my first all over again. If that’s what you want, that is.” My voice shook. Did I just ask Julian if he was waiting for us to have sex? Was that even on his mind? Why was it on mine? Our relationship had been so casual yet so intense the past few weeks of my recovery, I wasn’t too sure how to compartmentalize it. Part of me wanted no physical contact, yet another wanted it all.
    Was this even a relationship? Perhaps Julian just wanted to help me get better, that’s all. And here I was thinking it was more than that.
    I’m such a freak! I felt my cheeks heat and turned to face him. I needed to know where we stood. What we were exactly? I’d been living at Julian’s house for weeks, and he didn’t seem to keen on me leaving. Did that mean something, or was I reading too much into this?
    He leaned back, a veil of shock covering his face.
    “I crossed a line, didn’t I? I’m such a fool.” I lowered my head. A swarm of embarrassment tingled me all over. That odd sensation of wanting to die crept up my spine. I bet I could crawl into that tiny crack in the wall on the other side of the room. Imagining myself away from Julian was next to impossible, though, because living without him just didn’t make sense.
    “No, K. Everything is fine.” He lifted my chin with his finger. “I just always assumed Tristan was your first.”
    Phew! Was that all?
    “I’m not that easy, Julian. I have some self-respect.” I nudged him with my shoulder. “Except with you... I didn’t need to hesitate with you.”
    “I’d never think that about you, K. But you had been together for a while before we...”
    The mere memory of that night stung deliciously between my legs in a way I hadn’t felt in a long time—and that I hadn’t thought I could feel again. And this time, it stirred no bad thoughts.
    An awkward silence pushed us apart. I organized my thoughts before I spoke again.
    “Why are you doing this, Julian? Why do you care so much? How can you have so much hope for me?”
    He ran his fingers through his hair. Julian did that a lot when he was nervous. “I let you go once. I let another man steal you away from me. Albeit my brother, but it doesn’t matter. I faltered the moment my feelings were challenged, and I shouldn’t have.”
    “What feelings?” I whispered.
    “Kendra, we’ve been friends for a long time. That night, in my office, you opened up my world. You showed me what I could have beyond work and countless hours at the office. I shouldn’t have let you go. I was blinded by your relationship with Tristan and didn’t realize what I truly felt. I forbid myself to believe it was more than a friendship. I thought I made a mistake. But what happened between us, from that very first day on the train, to that night in my office, was more than friendship. It always has been.” He paused for a moment regarding me.
    I felt my mouth open slightly, breathing in his words.
    “What I felt in here” – Julian tapped his chest – “grew every time I saw you, even when you were with my brother. Do you know how many times I beat him up in that boxing ring because I thought about his mouth on yours? He could never figure out where I found the strength and drive to win every single challenge. And it was you – it was always you. I’ve cared