am outside do I finally erupt.
CHAPTER 14
Bella
“They won’t go away,” I mutter, looking down as I fist my hands in my lap. I hate being here and the only reason I agreed to these sessions is to appease Jade. She’s done so much for me. They all have, but this is a waste of time and money.
“Did you think they would?”
“Yes,” I say, lifting my eyes to meet Dr. Hamilton’s. “It’s over now. I should be able to move on.”
“That’s not how it works, Bella. We’ve discussed this before. Nightmares are the brain's way of focusing your attention on issues you need to address.”
“What’s there to address? It happened. I can’t go back and change it, but I don’t want to keep reliving it over and over again.” It’s the same thing I’ve told him each and every time we’ve met. What doesn’t he get?
He says nothing momentarily, nodding his head and for a moment I think he finally gets it. “What are your nightmares about?”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I mumble, feeling even more discouraged. “What do you think they’re about?” I fume.
“I want to hear the words, Bella. Not that he hurt you or did things to you. I want you to say exactly what happened and what was going through your mind.”
Narrowing my eyes at him, it takes everything I have not to get up and walk out of his office. “No.”
“And there lies your problem. You can’t hide from your past, Bella. Until you are willing to talk about it, no one can help you.”
Shaking my head, I quickly rise from my chair. “So I guess we’re done then,” I say, rushing towards the door.
“Bella.” Drawing in a deep breath, I turn around, looking at Dr. Hamilton defiantly. He can’t help me. No one can. “Do you really think running away will solve all your problems?
“No, but how will sitting here help me? Don’t you get it? I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to forget!”
“I once had a patient even more insolent than you,” he says in a hushed tone. “She was such a beautiful, young girl that had been through more hell than anyone I have ever encountered. She wanted to forget too.”
“And you helped her?” I ask, sinking into the chair I had just abandoned.
He shakes his head. “To forget? No. Those memories are still with her to this very day,” he says as he rises from his chair. Without another word, he heads for the door and steps out of his office for a brief moment, only to return a moment later followed by Jade.
My eyes widen, a look of confusion on my face as Jade takes a seat in the empty chair beside me.
“Don’t worry, Bella. I only asked Jade to come today to share her story with you,” Dr. Hamilton continues, resuming his seat across from us. “So that you can see firsthand that a person can overcome their past, even if the memory never goes away. We won’t discuss anything about your personal experience unless you choose to do so.”
I say nothing, reluctantly nodding my head in agreement. I don’t see how this will help, but if it means him laying off of me for a while, I’m up for anything.
“I didn’t have the pleasure of meeting Jade until later in life, so I can’t take credit for anything she is about to tell you, but I think her story is one you need to hear.”
Turning my attention to Jade, I listen intently as she starts to speak. “I was sixteen when I first visited hell,” she begins.
There are no tears as she tells her story: handed over to a rival club by her uncle. She does not waver as she talks of the four years of torture she suffered at the hands of those men, but I can see the pain radiating in her eyes as she relives just a portion of the torment she endured. Suddenly, all pain disappears and is replaced with an emotion that is foreign to me, as she speaks of the man who saved her. Viper, the man with the eyes of a coldblooded killer,
CHAPTER 14
Bella
“They won’t go away,” I mutter, looking down as I fist my hands in my lap. I hate being here and the only reason I agreed to these sessions is to appease Jade. She’s done so much for me. They all have, but this is a waste of time and money.
“Did you think they would?”
“Yes,” I say, lifting my eyes to meet Dr. Hamilton’s. “It’s over now. I should be able to move on.”
“That’s not how it works, Bella. We’ve discussed this before. Nightmares are the brain's way of focusing your attention on issues you need to address.”
“What’s there to address? It happened. I can’t go back and change it, but I don’t want to keep reliving it over and over again.” It’s the same thing I’ve told him each and every time we’ve met. What doesn’t he get?
He says nothing momentarily, nodding his head and for a moment I think he finally gets it. “What are your nightmares about?”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I mumble, feeling even more discouraged. “What do you think they’re about?” I fume.
“I want to hear the words, Bella. Not that he hurt you or did things to you. I want you to say exactly what happened and what was going through your mind.”
Narrowing my eyes at him, it takes everything I have not to get up and walk out of his office. “No.”
“And there lies your problem. You can’t hide from your past, Bella. Until you are willing to talk about it, no one can help you.”
Shaking my head, I quickly rise from my chair. “So I guess we’re done then,” I say, rushing towards the door.
“Bella.” Drawing in a deep breath, I turn around, looking at Dr. Hamilton defiantly. He can’t help me. No one can. “Do you really think running away will solve all your problems?
“No, but how will sitting here help me? Don’t you get it? I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to forget!”
“I once had a patient even more insolent than you,” he says in a hushed tone. “She was such a beautiful, young girl that had been through more hell than anyone I have ever encountered. She wanted to forget too.”
“And you helped her?” I ask, sinking into the chair I had just abandoned.
He shakes his head. “To forget? No. Those memories are still with her to this very day,” he says as he rises from his chair. Without another word, he heads for the door and steps out of his office for a brief moment, only to return a moment later followed by Jade.
My eyes widen, a look of confusion on my face as Jade takes a seat in the empty chair beside me.
“Don’t worry, Bella. I only asked Jade to come today to share her story with you,” Dr. Hamilton continues, resuming his seat across from us. “So that you can see firsthand that a person can overcome their past, even if the memory never goes away. We won’t discuss anything about your personal experience unless you choose to do so.”
I say nothing, reluctantly nodding my head in agreement. I don’t see how this will help, but if it means him laying off of me for a while, I’m up for anything.
“I didn’t have the pleasure of meeting Jade until later in life, so I can’t take credit for anything she is about to tell you, but I think her story is one you need to hear.”
Turning my attention to Jade, I listen intently as she starts to speak. “I was sixteen when I first visited hell,” she begins.
There are no tears as she tells her story: handed over to a rival club by her uncle. She does not waver as she talks of the four years of torture she suffered at the hands of those men, but I can see the pain radiating in her eyes as she relives just a portion of the torment she endured. Suddenly, all pain disappears and is replaced with an emotion that is foreign to me, as she speaks of the man who saved her. Viper, the man with the eyes of a coldblooded killer,
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